This first blog was originally posted on Facebook. It is about the lack of a satisfactory workout facility in my hometown. Enjoy.
I recently turned 27. I'm not old or young. I'm in some limbo nearing 30 but still trying to hang on to my youth as tightly as I possibly can. Things are different than I thought they would be. I didn't think I would be on a 12 year college path. Alas, here I am. I'm happy but I also realize that 27 isn't 20. I need to get my stuff together. By stuff, I mean jiggle.
The gym has been calling my name off and on for years now. I heed to its beckoning on occasion but I also listen only at convenience. No more I say! I'm determined to be in the best shape of my life. Therefore, with a purchase of new workout clothes, kicks and the new iPod Nano (highly recommend because it clips to your workout gear), I am back at the gym on a regular basis.
Dear Chattanooga, can you please provide a place to tone ones self that doesn't include old people, 18 year olds, or a million year contract where you have to sign away your life? My dear friend Emmy and I have gone the the downtown Y recently. No Maam. There was an old guy hovering over my bike the second I quit using it. He was all, "hey are you gonna ride or what?" I wanted to say "EFF OFF GRANDPA!" but I didn't. There as a strange combination of career people in their 30's and old people trying to not die. I don't know about you but I need people that are in shape working out around me. Old people with their flabby skin don't make me want to be on American Gladiators. They were all sweaty and... IN SPANDEX.
Then there was the Arc. For those of you unaware, the Arc is UTC's newest addition. It is equipped with 3 stories of new equipment and fun things to keep you entertained while working out. I loved it at first. Since I am on the 12 year track at college, I have a "free" membership included in my $5,000/year tuition. When we first started going regularly to the Arc, it was fantastic. Hardly ever any people there, with a nice array of toned hot boys closer to our age to look at. (Don't pretend to judge me here, everyone wants eye candy at the gym.) Now that all these 100lb. idiots have new years resolutions, you can hardly walk in the place anymore. Emmy and I came the other day and there were 6 girls sitting on a yoga mat socializing the entire hour and a half that we were there, working out. I'm pretty sure rush week has been moved to the gym. (I have no problem with people in the Greek community that don't fall under this category. However, if you head to the Arc anytime soon you will see what I mean.) As I have said previously, some of us are there to actually work out. I can't handle these 18 year old girls with their designer workout clothes and hair did that stand around the machines, blocking their use, with no attempts to actually do anything physically. I just can't take it anymore! P.S. fat girls that think you're in shape...
You're not foolin anyone with your sports bra and t-shirt cut to resemble a guys muscle tank. When the arm holes gape to your waist, we can see those rolls of yours.
So, next will be the Rush. I worked out there for about a year and a half before and liked it. It's not bad if you don't mind meatheads staring at each other more than they're looking at you. Plus, the downtown location has like hardly anything in there. Oh, that's right... YOU HAVE TO SIGN CONTRACTS. I think last time it was a 2 year contract. Have you met me? I'm a nomad. I move too much for that. Who knows where I'll be in two years? I don't want to pay the $239487234987 that you have to in order to work out at the sports barn either. The 24/7 gym has like nothing in it. I JUST WANT TO WORK OUT WITH LESS PEOPLE AROUND ME AND A VARIETY OF EQUIPMENT WITHOUT SPENDING A MILLION DOLLARS. C'mon Chatty, help a sista out.
Want to air your dirty thoughts and hatred for me? Or perhaps you want to show some love? Feel free to do so now. I can handle it. After all, thats what these "P.S.'s" are for...
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